Why?
I am studying psychology. I'm doing my grades based Honours programme. I talk people out of their rut and provide my presence and support. I've tried to do the same for and to myself. I've tried to convince myself that I care about myself.
Actually, I don't
My actions and thoughts say I don't.
A part of me feels guilty that I'm wasting everyone's care, concern and support. A part of me wants to piece and hold everything together.
Yet a part of me wants self-destruction
It's so weird and strange
I thought I was okay, but turns out I wasn't
I wish I could apply what I've learnt but touching everything just nets me a deep cut, so deep, everything burns and rots
I should know what to do. I should know what to say to myself.
But I'm not doing any of it
Any of it...
How long can I stay broken?
